Thursday, March 26, 1998

How to deal with the public

By NESSA MacERLEAN

London Observer Service

It helps to be interested in human nature if you have a job which involves dealing with the public. And if you observe it closely enough, you will soon have enough material for a novel. Here are some tips:

- Understand that many people cannot cope with this kind of work. You may be one of them - if, for example, you can't bear repetition or don't enjoy observing human nature. Those most able in this role, like radio talk-show hosts, tend to have a positive view of human nature and often expect the best of people.

- Smile, count to 10 and follow the usual old-fashioned advice if people are getting on your nerves. "It makes an enormous difference if you smile as you speak," says a civil servant and former complaints-handler. "If you look interested and let them talk, people burn themselves out."

- Never take bad temper personally. "People who are good at dealing with the public often have very strong boundaries and are usually very well worked out," says psychotherapist Frances Wilks, personal development course director at City University in London. "They have a great deal of empathy, but they don't take things personally. They understand that when someone is angry, they are not angry with them; it's just that life isn't working out that day." If you deal with 100 people in a day, you'll undoubtedly find some in a bad mood.

- Use your imagination to think about the pressures faced by different clients. If you have the same expectations of everyone, you will frequently get frustrated. An elderly person who lives alone may need to ease into a conversation with their bank manager by chatting about the weather - but a workaholic with a lunchtime appointment may get agitated by small talk.

- Don't assume that ordinary people will lead their private lives as efficiently as you lead your work life. You may be employed to send out long letters explaining why people owe more tax. They will often be so shocked to receive the letter that they react emotionally rather than rationally. Many will not read the letter at all and might phone to ask you to explain. If you become impatient, you are missing some important points about human nature.

- Look for support from colleagues if you feel harassed. The better you are at the job, the more you may have sublimated your normal responses and need to express your frustration. The pressure will be particularly acute if you are under time constraints - perhaps having to make a lot of telephone calls an hour. If you don't have someone saying, "He sounds like a creep to me," you might get depressed because you could start blaming yourself.

- Savor the good moments. If you observed people closely, you would soon have material for a novel. "People can say one sentence and you can construct so much of their whole situation from it," says former London postman Nick Gillies. Another postman's perk is seeing "famous people in dressing gowns."

(Distributed by Scripps Howard News Service.)