Monday, February 16, 1998

The Sensible Center still fond of Bill

By Joseph Spear

Pollsters and pundits are perplexed by Bill Clinton's soaring popularity in the wake of relentless reports that he carried on a sexual relationship with a White House intern.

Righteous Republicans, who would apparently have us believe they are sexless beings who replicate their species through spontaneous generation, seem confused.

"I don't know what to think" about Clinton's 79 percent approval rating, Senate Majority Leader Trent Lott told reporters. "What we need is a few more allegations, and it could go over 100 maybe."

I am not perplexed, nor am I surprised. It has been my conviction for many years that the bulk of the American people are firmly rooted in the Sensible Center, and that if they get enough information, they will make the right choice every time.

The vast majority keep open minds, weigh the evidence and then decide. Their verdict is usually fair and judicious and wise.

My informal survey indicates the Sensible Center is still chewing over the Monica Lewinsky affair. Their interim judgment:

-- Sexual infidelity, while not a sanctioned activity, is a private matter that should be worked out between husband and wife, sinner and confessor, aberrant and shrink.

We are not talking about murder or armed robbery or physical assault here. We are talking about raging hormones. Sexual impulses are sometimes strong and the flesh is often weak. Many times, such situations call for compassion and forgiveness.

Even the holiest of presidents, Jimmy Carter, lusted in his heart.

Whatever his carnal appetites, Clinton is a family man who loves his wife and adores his daughter. He is clearly not a sexual predator or an abuser.

Of all the women he stands accused of relating with, none has voiced aversion except Paula Jones, who waited until Governor Bill became President Bill before becoming aware of her displeasure. Monica is of age, and by all reports, she certainly does not seem to have lacked enthusiasm.

-- Above all, amorous affairs should not become the subject of official investigation.

The last thing we need is a posse of Moral Polizei running around poking their noses into bedrooms.

-- The Monica business reeks of dirty politics and literally hits below the belt. Yes, there is a possibility that Bill Clinton may have committed a "crime" by crossing his fingers and equivocating under oath to Paula Jones' attorneys when presented with the Hobson's Choice of death by confession or death by fib.

Even if true, it amounts to perjury in a civil matter, an infraction that is rarely pursued.

The alleged act of perjury is more likely an excuse, a method of criminalizing Clinton's moral transgressions for the purpose of deposing him or humiliating him in the court of public opinion. If Kenneth Starr is truly interested in nailing perpetrators of federal crime, he would indict himself and his band of zealots, who have been leaking like cheap faucets.

-- The media, as they usually do during their periodic feeding frenzies, look like fat and happy wolves who just dined on a host of hapless hares.

Day after day, they pursue their quarry, rushing rumor and tip into print, utterly oblivious to the disgust with which they are being regarded. It is understood that they are in the throes of mass orgasm, but must they look so smarmy and sound so ecstatic as they wreak their destruction?

-- We voted for a president, not a pope. Like Bill Clinton or not, agree with him or not, the man can run a government. He is articulate and extremely intelligent and has earned the respect of other world leaders.

During his White House tenure, the economy has soared, the stock market has gone on a tear, unemployment is way down and the budget is in balance.

All in all, the Sensible Center thinks that Bill Clinton, despite an apparently chronic erotic itch, is a decent guy and that the media and Moral Polizei ought to get off his back.

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