Saturday, May 30, 1998

Vigils held to comfort survivors and protest violence

By YONAT SHIMRON / Raleigh News & Observer

RALEIGH, N.C. -- The two sisters arrived at the spot on the lonely gravel road bearing daisies. Here, amid the green grass and with the sun poking its head through the clouds, they met 15 strangers -- people who had never known them or their sister but who wanted to help.

Here, on this very stretch of road, only a week earlier, Debbie Figueroa, 30, was shot and killed by her husband, who then took his own life.

And here, on a Wednesday evening, members from Pullen Memorial and Martin Street Baptist churches gathered to remember Figueroa and to speak out against her violent death.

"We want to stand with you, Stephanie and Kris, and your family in your pain and anguish," said the Rev. Mahan Siler, pastor of Pullen Memorial. "An even deeper reason why we're here is that we worship a God whose spirit is against violence and seeks passionately to break that cycle of violence."

The sisters, their arms around one another, stood silently, tears welling in their eyes. After reciting a psalm and saying a prayer, the group dispersed.

"They were complete strangers but they didn't feel like that to me," said Figueroa's sister, Stephanie Shear, 32. "I'm glad they were there. It was such a peaceful, warm feeling."

So began the first vigil against violence in Raleigh, a project Pullen Memorial and Martin Street Baptist churches plan to reenact every time a person is killed in the city limits.

The idea is spreading. Across the country, annual candlelight vigils and silent marches where murdered people's shoes are publicly displayed are growing in popularity. Some say the vigils have assumed the power of a civil rights protest.

"Remember, the civil rights movement started out with a group of people standing around in a circle praying," said the Rev. Mel Williams of Watts Street Baptist Church in Durham, N.C., who has led half a dozen vigils. "Out of that came momentum and energy for change in public awareness and policy."

While some would like to see legislation limiting the sale of handguns, for the moment, the vigils are intended to let family members know there is a larger community that cares.

"This is a way of saying you're not forgotten" said George Currie, a deacon at Martin Street Baptist Church and one of the people who pushed for the vigil program. "Hurt has no religious or racial boundaries. It's something we all have in common."

The Durham vigils have drawn anywhere from 12 to 75 people. At times they have been cathartic experiences where family members have cried aloud. At other times, they've been quiet and solemn processions.

A recent vigil for Troy Arrington, a Durham resident killed April 26 in an argument with a neighbor, brought a special kind of reconciliation when the alleged killer's wife showed up for the service.

Deborah Knight, whose husband, Joseph, was arrested in connection with Arrington's death, said her husband was a good spouse and father. But at the vigil, she felt she had to apologize to the dead man's daughter.

"I told her I was sorry for what happened," Knight said. "It was a way to express what you feel. You saying a few words and my saying a few words changes things. It helps to have someone to talk to."

The Rev. Pebbles Lindsay, who performed the Arrington vigil, said the families weren't able to look at each other at first. But after reciting a prayer for Arrington and for Knight, people cried and tensions let up. Her fear that a fight might break out disappeared.

Since then, many have called to express their gratitude.

"They call to say thank you for sharing, thank you for your prayers, thank you for being in the community," said Lindsay, the associate minister at Mt. Gilead Baptist Church. "I know for a fact many families have been touched."

Both the Durham and Raleigh groups say they plan to set up a system that would allow churches, synagogues and mosques to keep in touch with the families and help them heal.

"The vigil doesn't help the basic conditions that cause violence," said David Winer, executive director of Durham Congregations in Action. "There are still dysfunctional families, poverty, people who have lost hope." But he added, "People understand that we're trying to bring comfort and peace to the community. And many of the family and neighbors appreciate that their loved ones are being recognized as worthy of prayer."

Stephanie Shear, Debbie Figueroa's sister, said the vigil was a heartening event during a very dark week.

"There's a lot of negative energy and anger I feel toward this senseless act," Shear said. "It consumes you. You get so angry you want to lash out. The vigil was a way to rechannel it into positive energy."

(Distributed by Scripps Howard News Service.)