Saturday, November 15, 1997

Mother care vs. Au Pair, day care

By Mike McManus

The case of the English au pair Louise Woodward who was found guilty of killing 8-month old Matthew Eappen is disturbing at three levels.

First, 50 medical experts in child abuse signed a letter that asserted, "The prosecution put forward well-established medical evidence that overwhelmingly supported a violent shaking/im- pact episode on the day in question," when the boy was in Ms. Woodward's sole custody.

His injuries - a swelling brain, fractured skull, bleeding in the head and eyes - are virtually uniquely traced to this injury. It could not have occurred three weeks earlier, as alleged.

Second, the judge not only reduced her charges to man- slaughter, which was reasonable, but also set her free when a usual sentence is three to five years, which was unreasonable.

More important, the parents were negligent. The mother was not a divorced woman who had no choice but to work, but the wife of a physician who clearly earned enough for her to remain at home with her infant son. True, she did only work part-time and did come home to nurse the child. But why was the au pair needed at all?

Mothers "should be the primary caretakers of infants during at least the first year to 18 months of life," writes David Popenoe in his 1996 book, "Life Without Father."

What about day care?

"The more both parents can be in close contact with the child in the early years, the better. Out- of-home child care normally should be limited to not more than 10 to 20 hours per week for at least the first year of life; a number of studies have found negative effects on child development when out-of-home care exceeds this amount. After age three, there is little evidencethat high-quality day care has nega- tive effects on children."

However, Popenoe believes fathers have a responsibility to create an environment that "permits a strong mother-child rela- tionship," and to help with feeding, dressing, bathing and playing with the child.

Even President Clinton appears to agree. In his 1997 State of the Union Address, he said that scientists are discovering how even new-borns develop emotionally and intellectually from their first days, making it important for parents "to begin immediately talking, singing, even reading to their infants."

But his April, 1997 White House Conference on Early Childhood Development and Learning went in the opposite direction, arguing for mandatory universal(public) day care to reverse "current patterns of (parental) neglect."

With exquisite timing, in April,1997 a study was released from the National Institute of Child Health and Human Devel- opment that claimed day care was not harmful to a child's development. But the Statistical Assessment Service (STATS) con- cluded the study's methodology was questionable and said it was released for political, not scien- tific purposes.

STATS found that many of the children involved in the study were cared for in their own homes by fathers or grand- mothers, not in day care institutions.

"No wonder they were 'doing fine.' Why should we call that day care? More properly, many people would refer to the practice as FATHERING."

STATS also cited other research finding the detrimental effect of day carebegins with children enduring more than 20 hours a week of care.

"But this study lumped children with up to 30 hours of care in with children receiving only 10 hours per week."

Bill Mattox, Research Director of the Family Research Council, says the biggest problem facing American children today is a lack of time with parents who spend "40 percent less time with their children that did parents in 1965." The percentage of mar- ried mothers with children under six who are working has soared from 29 to 63 percent since 1965. Yet a New York Timessurvey found 83 percent of working moms feel torn and want more time with their kids.

There is an answer. Margaret Thatcher, Sandra Day O'Connor and Jeane Kirkpatrick all took time off to rear their young chil- dren. Their careers were not hurt. More mothers should do the same.

It is better to drive junker cars and have sound kids, than to have pricey cars and neglected kids.

Copyright Michael J. McManus 1997.