Friday, July 30, 1999
Woods vs. Duval: a golf matchup in the Don
King tradition
By Stan Hochman
Knight Ridder Newspapers
PHILADELPHIA — In golf, it ain't over until they engrave
your name on the trophy. Unless, of course, you're Jean Van de
Velde, and you have a three-stroke lead in the British Open, with
one hole to play.
“C'est la vie,” said Brigitte Van de Velde, after
Jean hacked out a triple-bogey seven on the final hole and plopped
into a three-way playoff, which he lost from here to Paree.
C'est la vie translates into “That's life,” and automatically
makes Brigitte a candidate for golf's wife of the year. Never
mind what she told Jean over the Beaujolais that night.
That's golf. You can't play 71 holes like Sam Snead and the
last hole like Mortimer Snerd and hope to win a major tournament.
You remember Snead, straw hat, smooth swing. You remember Snerd,
one of Edgar Bergen's dummies, freckled, dopey.
You remember Snead and Snerd, you're one of those people who
watch golf on television all the time. Probably have a closet
full of emerald green pants and madras sportcoats. You have ties
older than Tiger Woods.
ABC is looking for a wider (translates, younger) audience Monday,
when it televises Woods against David Duval in a head-to-head
match at Sherwood Country Club in Thousand Oaks, Calif.
That's what it is, television programming, an alternative to
dreadful summer reruns. It surely ain't golf. It definitely isn't
tantalizing, even though the winner gets $1.1 million. That's
because the loser gets $400,000.
Whatever became of winner take all? Whatever became of each
guy putting up $750,000 and the winner walks off with the $1.5
million? Whatever became of Lee Trevino's definition of pressure,
which is when you're playing a $10 Nassau with five bucks in your
pocket?
Trevino laughs all the way to the bank every time he's invited
to play in one of those clumsy Skins Game charades. How much laughter
would you hear if those guys had to dig into their own pockets
for the loot?
If Duval and Woods are the best two golfers out there, how
come they haven't met head-to-head on a Sunday, last pairing of
the day? That would be exciting. Not this contrived made-for-TV
exhibition, with nothing at stake but the championship of International
Management Group.
Uh-huh, IMG manages both golfers. Sounds like one of those
Don King championship matches, where he owns a piece of both fighters.
Older Americans love the final-hole drama of the major tournaments.
They loved Van de Velde blowing at least half-a-million by stubbornly
using a driver off the tee on that last hole. They loved the way
he adamantly clanked a 2-iron second shot off the grandstands,
the way he grimly rolled up his pants to check out his fourth
shot, which he had plopped into the muddy canal. And they truly
love the way he blasted out of the trap and rolled in a six-footer
and clenched his fist in triumph and threw the ball into the crowd
when the ordeal was finally over.
C'est la vie, indeed.
And now, even before the PGA, the fourth major, we interrupt
this golf season to bring you Duval-Woods in prime time, where
the loser is guaranteed $400,000. Holy Ben Hogan. Is that more
than Snead made in a lifetime?
They're starting at 4:30 in California, which might turn it
into a run for daylight. It's match play, which adds a distinctive,
dramatic element to the event. It's a risk, because if Woods closes
Duval out, up four holes with three to play, how do they fill
the remaining time?
Woods could bounce a golf ball off his 2-iron 47 times and
then slam it down the fairway.
And what will Duval do to fill the gap if he wins 4-and-3?
This might be the dullest golfer since Jack Fleck. Guys in emerald
green pants remember Jack Fleck.
What exactly has Duval done lately? Doesn't matter. He is still
ranked first, using a system popularized by Chicago mayors and
Russian prime ministers. Woods, on the other hand, has won the
Buick Invitational, the Memorial, the Deutsche Bank Open and the
Motorola Western Open.
Duval struggled at Carnoustie, Woods stayed in contention until
the last day. What was even more impressive is the way Woods accepted
the nasty challenge of wind and weather and ridiculously narrow
fairways.
If Woods has an advantage, it's in his distance off the tee.
But he couldn't use his driver when the fairways were narrower
than Calista Flockhart and the rough was as high as an elephant's
eye.
Did he squawk? Nope. Said it forced you to think out there,
to adjust to the howling wind (translated, whether to use an 8-
or a 9-iron to hit it 190 yards with the “breeze” at
your back).
Woods is winning and showing signs of maturity. It's time he
won another major. Playing Duval on a soft track such as Sherwood
is not the best way to prepare for the PGA, but you can't knock
the money. And the ratings will determine if Woods can turn this
into a television series of his own, playing foreign golfers in
faraway places with strange-sounding names.
You thought there was a rule against that? You thought the
PGA controlled TV access? You're right, but commissioner Tim Finchem
agreed to waive the rule once IMG waved $1 million his way. Let
the record show, Sherwood put up $1 million to hold the event.
One saving grace is that they're not claiming it's winner take
all. Television got caught in the 1970s when those head-to-head
challenge tennis matches made that claim and it turned out one
“loser” took home $280,000.
This time, they're trying to make it more appealing by having
each golfer donate $200,000 to charity. Half the money will go
to “The First Tee,” a PGA program that introduces minorities
to golf. The other half will go to a charity of choice. Once again,
they'll use OPM, other people's money.
There is a rich tradition of head-to-head matches in golf,
but that was in another era, before golfers sold advertising on
their caps, their shirts, their golf bags.
It used to happen in horse racing, too. Last big one put the
swift filly, Ruffian, against the colt, Foolish Pleasure. The
colt ran with Ruffian right from the start, hoping to break her
will. Broke her leg, instead, and had to be destroyed.
With the backstretch humming with sadness and sympathy, Foolish
Pleasure's trainer, Leroy Jolley, put the event in perspective.
“You can't play this game in short pants,” he said.
Jolley must hate Duval-Woods, with the loser guaranteed $400,000.
I do, too.
The world of sports extends beyond the ballparks, outside the
arenas. Each Thursday, Stan Hochman will take a look at sports
reflected in the popular culture, through books, magazines, theater,
movies, television and art.
(c) 1999, Philadelphia Daily News.
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Wide Web site of the Philadelphia Daily News, at http://www.philly.com/
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